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Ashover Cricket Club
Player Profiles
(Any offence caused by these observations is purely intentional.)
Click on the thumbnails to see the big picture!
Andy
Colleyshaw
Ashover's import from Sumo wrestling. Yorkshire lad (!!), placid temperament and slightly deaf (conveniently so at times). Doubles up as a sight screen if not selected. Once ran a mile in under four hours.
Jack
Bradford
60 years old Newcastle supporter. Straight talking Geordie, ex Club secretary and opening bat, known for his exciting stroke play and rapid scoring. Is known to be really excited about Newcastle's forthcoming Champion's League campaign.
Tim
Ducksbury
"Fat Boy Tim" is the 1st team vice captain and occasional run scorer. Whilst Tim is a successful local businessman, he is best known for his delectable wife Wendy. Is fastidious at keeping fit, visiting the gym at least once a month most months.
Charlie Gwillim
Tall dark and handsome player whose devilish good looks belie his 48 years. His cultured stroke play coupled with his elegant and effective bowling makes him the envy of his team mates. His speed across the ground in the field has to be seen to be believed.
Roy
Bolstridge
"The Professor". Can always be relied upon to introduce logic into a situation, therefore ruining many a good argument. Ashover stalwart since Adam was a lad and is supported by the formidable Thelly.
Frank
Lomas
Glove man Frank is a keen exponent of French Cricket when batting. When keeping he claims to be able to spot all Charlie Gwillim's variations. (more than Charlie can then!)
Huw
Champion
Suave, sophisticated socialist, Huw is a keen oarsman (have I spelt that correctly?). Always "Champions" the underdog, always seeing good in everyone. New glasses needed Huw! Actually arrived early for a game - note the date - 12 May 2002!
John
Hunter
Known as the "limpet" for his ability to stick around when batting, his next aim is to try to score some runs as well. Was under the impression that the edge of the square was the boundary but has now been told otherwise, so his ambition now is to get the ball off the square. We expect this to be achieved at least once next season.
Lee
Rhodes
Young fast bowler Lee, also known as Leroy, has the body of a Greek God (oops, sorry, a typo, that should be Greek Dog). One for the future, Lee is a consistent batsman (last scored a run 2 years ago) and his ambition is to be as good as his hero, Charlie Gwillim.
Dave Cooke
2nd X1 Captain, bats anywhere from 1-11, specialist slip fielder!!. Ashover's one man junior cricket manager, scorer, umpire and team bus driver. Casual Manchester United supporter. (Aren't they all?).
Russell Cooke
Son of Dave, scores very quickly usually 50 and out, so that he gets more time to preen himself for a night out down town. Former Notts County trainee now plying his trade with Hucknall Town – obviously a step up in class Charlie!
Andy Lunn
Known as ‘No Mates’ in the dressing room. Lunny is a cavalier middle order batsman who has bowled for Ashover, although not recently. Forest fan so knows little about football (anybody know if he's ever been to a game?). Well known for his whale impersonation.
Bil Hartley
Still only 19 seems to have been playing for years. Has a remarkable average this season, bettered only by every player in the 1st X1, 2nd X1, Friendly X1, U15 X1 and Kwik Cricket side. Outstanding prospect as a wicket keeper.
Ian King
Was once an opening batsman now usually found at No.11. Has missed much of the season due to a finger injury caused when trying to cut his finger nails with an axe. Used sparingly now as a bowler due to advancing years and receding hair line. Only player in cricket still using an SS Jumbo 105 bat (first used in 1980).
Iain Broome
Son of the Bar Steward, so always worth his place in the side and he is currently an aspiring author (anything sooner than work). Opening bowler, claims most of his victims with his stock ball the over-pitched yorker (full toss), although his slower ball is Warnesque. Another player released by the Notts County youth academy.
Roger
Bolstridge
Calming influence in the dressing room, always takes time out to talk to the opposition and most games can be seen discussing the laws of the game with the Umpires. Treats every game like a friendly. Marriage to the vivacious Ms. Robins has certainly had an effect upon him.
Richard
Roddis
Banker Richard isn't usually seen on the cricket field until July when barbecue and holiday seasons have finished. Hard hitting lower order batsman who also bowls occasional spin. Local resident whose house is regularly featured on Peak Practice. Another member of Crispin Casuals F.C. – plays in most positions his best being Linesman!!!.
Wayne Carline
Cultured stroke player in the David Gower mode – Well he bats left handed. Player manager of the mighty Crispin Casuals F.C. although most of their wins last season came when Wayne was not playing!. Once scored 84 using only one stroke although he maintains he used two. Only goalkeeper in Ashover 6-a-side football history to have been lobbed twice in the same game – once by the opposition goalkeeper. Excellent fund raiser for Ashover C.C.
Danny Higgon
Otherwise known as ‘Young Charlie’. Danny is part owner of the world renowned Morton Zoo, which features chipmunks, chinchilla’s, sheep, goats, cats, Vietnamese pot bellied pigs and much other local wildlife. Has already claimed the year 2001 champagne moment with his fantastic catch at Milton (Don’t ask him about it he’s very shy). Only bowls well when Champ is captain. Great Britain’s next Duncan Goodhew.
Bill
Vermeulen
Recently returned to the fold after a five year sabbatical spent trying to find himself (not sure if it worked) all he seems to have done is lose his hair and find a Severn Trent cap. Has a scoring rate of over 100 runs a ball so far this season although his innings usually go 4 or 6 and then out. Bowls well on helpful pitches usually the ones to the right or left of the strip we’re actually playing on.
Ian Cooke
Before the start of the season Ian was 6ft 8 and weighed 22 stone, he is now 4ft 2 and 8 stone as he has spent much of the season running from fine leg to fine leg as our 11th man. Came back from batting at Grassmoor with more bruises than Brian Close. However reaped his revenge by taking a hat trick in the Kwik Cricket encounter against players his own age - not 4 times it!!!!. Another major fund raiser for Ashover C.C. with his football card sales skills.
Dave Radford
Ashover’s answer to Shane Warne only difference being Radders turns it. Came to Ashover in the late 80’s as a renowned free-scoring opening batsman. Now known as a good fielder. Once scored 40 odd against Sherwood Colliery anyone who saw it still talks of it with fond regard always adding "wasn’t that the last time Dave Radford got runs?". Chesterfield F.C’s no1 fan although failed in an audition to become Chester the Field Mouse (mascot) as he was deemed too small for the costume.
Joe
Alexander
Joe "wide boy" Alexander is a new, young recruit and little is known about him other than he is a shy retiring type lacking in confidence. Will be a big lad when he grows up. Brought his father Paul with him on occasions and he has now been press ganged. Recognises a good bat when he sees one (mine!).
David Bush
Another new recruit in his teens, David's brief is to bring down the average age of the second team and try to wade in with some runs and a few wickets as a bonus. Has recently converted from Chesterfield supporter to Stags supporter due to the influence of Lucy.
Mark
Winson
Scooter boy Winno started off as a batter who could bowl, but has turned into a bowler who can't bat! Obviously learned that one from Charlie then!
Rick
Holland
Shy retiring Rick has recently taken on the mantle of Social Secretary which should provide an interesting scenario. Whilst being fluent in French, seems to concentrate mainly on Anglo Saxon language.
Robin
Ashcroft
Train driver Robin's main claim to fame is that he was Best Man at Roger's wedding (not too difficult to achieve really) and is a hard hitting (for a short arse) middle order batsmen who fancies himself as a bowler. Fortunately, no-one else does, excepting the opposition batsmen.
Tomas
Martin
Another member of Dave Cooke's youngsters, Tomas is finding his feet in the second team. Is very well supported in his endeavours by his father, Trev.
Thelly
Bolstridge
Current President Thelly is a renowned scorer and a demon with the vac in the pavilion. Is now the number 2 scorer in the Bolstridge house with the success of Roy in achieving his qualification after his scorer's course.
John
Hamer
Andy
"2 Curries" Walker
Club Captain "Mr. Smooth" Andy is a cultured opening bat and wicketkeeper. Yet another of those casual Man. Utd. fans that generally appear well after their annual retreat from the Champion's League. Always guaranteed to be first in the shower after a game.
Paul
Alexander
Father of Joe, Paul has been recruited to raise the average age a little and is particularly known for his all run fours (well, 3 and a bits really!). Has now been elected onto the committee and appointed Under 17 Team Manager.
John
Harris
Information urgently needed!
Lee
Naughton
Whilst a staunch Chesterfield supporter, Lee has been to see the Stags 3 times this season including an away match, but this may have more to do with watching Lucy rather than watching Mansfield!
June
Cooke
Yet another member of the Cooke dynasty, June is a scorer, barmaid, I.T. specialist, chauffeur and also takes responsibility for supervising, coordinating and supporting Dave with his Youth Team activities.
Joe
Roberts
Information urgently needed!
Mark Waring
Mark is shortly to join the army although his first choice would have been the navy, where he would have been able to become a fully fledged stoker. His favourite band? The Village People of course!
Martin
Crinks
Martin is the new co-owner of Ashover Post Office and we are hoping that he will soon stamp his authority on the team to lick the opposition and post some high scores. (I know it's pathetic but it's late and I couldn't think of anything else.)
Merrick
Bull
"Mez" is seldom seen without a huge smile and his laugh can be heard at least 300 yards away. In his spare time he has been known to practice his tonsorial skills, being Clay Cross's leading barber.
Andrew
Gee
Another new recruit who foolishly volunteered and now is unable to get out of it (we know where he lives). Works in the construction industry, so he will soon be tapped up for his expert skills.
Graham
Kett
Rob
Carline
Another member of the famous Carline dynasty but doesn't play very often. Prefers to spend his time increasing the size of his family!
Don
& Lyn Bush
Don "Mr. Calm" & Lyn "Lights Up The Room" Bush are always to be found urging son David on to greater heights, particularly on the culinary front.
Fritz SteinhÖbel
I suppose Fritz would qualify as an overseas player were it not for the fact that he's only 14! Excellent prospect as a spin bowler and batsman. Not half as good as his sister though!
Rob Andrews
Long arm of the law Rob moved to Ashover recently and foolishly thought that he could buy a new bat (other than Readers) without Charlie Gwillim finding out. Foolish fellow, Charlie's got spies everywhere.
Adam Carline
Yet another member of the famous Carline dynasty who seems to lead a blameless life (unless anyone can let me know differently!)
James Hammond
James is an ex Clay Cross player where he played in the same team as Charlie Gwillim and obviously learned well from the master, picking up a hat trick against Anston. Claims to be Chris Cairns's love child, but nobody believes him.
Paul Fenwick
Paul has been recruited from Tibshelf and is keen to work with Dave Cooke as part of the Ashover Youth set up. I don't know too much about him yet, but I'm working on it.
Justin Synan
